


Bye, Autumn

by fructoseintolerant



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Ghosts, Angst, Comedy, Fluff, Found Family, Ghosts, M/M, Mark+00' Line are Ghosts, Suicide Attempt, jisung got possessed lmao
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:02:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27020947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fructoseintolerant/pseuds/fructoseintolerant
Summary: Currently, there are five ghosts playing rock paper scissors in his living room, deciding which one gets to possess him first. Should Jisung be concerned?
Relationships: Park Jisung (NCT) & Everyone, Park Jisung/Zhong Chen Le
Comments: 6
Kudos: 28





	Bye, Autumn

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by Hello Ghost! (2010).

_Life is meaningless._ Jisung took a pill.

 _Life is hard._ Jisung took another pill.

 _I have nobody._ Jisung took two pills at once.

 _I better die._ Jisung chugged the whole bottle.

He sucked in a sharp breath with his runny nose. He almost choked on his sob. With a mouth full of sleeping pills, he searched for the water bottle on the living room floor where he sat cross-legged. The sleeping pills were prescribed by his doctor after he complained of his hard time falling asleep. He hoped to sleep. One pill for one night. 

But Jisung was so tired that one night of sleep wasn't enough. He needed more sleep. So more pills he swallows.

He thought that his life was miserable and wanted it to end. Just, tired and wanted to rest. Maybe for a while but his experience told him that it wasn’t nearly enough.

This was his choice, so why did he cry?

His eyes were blurry and he hastily wiped it with his pajamas sleeve. Not caring whether he looked ugly or not. A part of him was concerned about his clothes because he believed that this will be his attire in the afterlife. Imagine spending the afterlife wearing a pajama with dog print. Jisung already did but didn't have the energy to change.

Maybe he did mourn to his own death even before it occurred. But he should save that for later on. That is if ghosts could shed a tear.

His hand reached for the water bottle blindly. He tapped the many spots and only found a hard cold floor. He frowned and turned his head, looking for the bottle.

The bottle was at the corner of the room, already empty.

Jisung furrowed his brow. This attempt was already prepared and it was impossible for him to forget the literal main props, the water to help him swallow these bitter pills.

He crawled to the bottle, mouth still full of the pills. A few fell to the floor, leaving a trailing mess behind as he crossed the living room. The pills started to dissolve by his saliva, leaving a bitter taste all over his tongue. But he can bear with it, just a little more.

He inspected the water bottle, then the empty water dispenser. Right, he already _prepared_ for this suicide.

Three days ago, he already emptied his house. His belongings were packed in a box, ready to be dumped in the garbage. He no longer purchased any food or groceries to be stocked in his fridge. When he dies, the food will be bad and he doesn't want to be a bother to someone who will find his body later. The water dispenser too, was empty. The water in the bottle was the last drop.

So, what now?

He sat still for a moment. The longer he sat still, the more his thoughts ran wild. He despised that.

Jisung bolted to the bathroom, opening the tap. He put his mouth under the running water. But his tongue couldn't even feel the first drop of the cold water. He opened his eyes slowly, the water ran out?

He stepped back from the water tap and saw his reflection in the mirror. Should he just chew all of these bitter pills without water?

He reluctantly went back to the living room, sitting in the middle of the floor, reevaluating his life choices. Even his suicide attempt sucked.

He sighed, mouth still uncomfortably full with the pills. The next moment he heard his phone rang.

He pulled out the phone from his pocket and checked the screen. The first thing he saw was his suicide note. But it was pretty embarrassing so he closed the note app immediately, focusing on the incoming phone call. 

_Evil Landlord._ He gulped a dry saliva.

"Hello, Mrs. Kim?" he tried to speak with a mouth full of pills. He must've sounded weird.

"Park Jisung! How many times do I have to tell you that you need to pay the water bills?!"

He tried to rearrange the pills inside his mouth so he could speak properly. "I'm sor-"

"You need to pay it right now, Park! Or I'll cut your water supply!"

Jisung distanced his ear from the phone and winced. Fearing that his eardrum would break under the loud volume of nagging. But why should he? He was supposed to die today. Dead people need no ears.

_Wasn't the water already ran out? Wasn't that why he sat here with his mouth full of bitter pills?_

Jisung nodded weakly even though Mrs. Kim couldn't see him. "Yes, yes, I understand. I'll pay it later, Mrs. Kim. Have a good day."

He sighed after closing the call. He was afraid that if Mrs. Kim heard him sighed while she was talking, she would become even more mad. After closing the call, Jisung looked around the house. It was empty and dark - courtesy to him didn't pay the electricity bills intentionally. Dead man doesn't need electricity nor water, right? 

He choked on his spit and spitted out all the pills. It shattered on the floor. He massaged his sore throat and wiped his tears. It was disgusting.

Actually this wasn't the first time. Suicide, I mean. I mean _it was_ the first time he tried this method, but not the first time he tried to kill himself.

Drowning himself in the Han River? Check.

Smoke in the car? Check.

Failed attempt on sleeping pills? Check!

There were so many methods on the internet. But Jisung has a standard. A high standard for a person who just wanted to die. 

No blood. He doesn't want to see his own blood. He is scared of blood and he didn’t want to faint before he succeeded. Blood means pain. He _did_ want to die but he doesn't want pain. It should be painless, because life is painful enough. He doesn't want his final hours to be painful too. So he avoids cutting or something similar.

No high places. It was scary. No other explanation. And to drop his body in a public place was a horror story for him. What if he accidently fell on a passerby? What if he kills another person besides himself?

Pretty sure that the probability is below one percent, but just to be sure...

On the internet, he found this method where you hire a hitman to shoot yourself. The idea was seducing but the thing is, he is a broke college student who can barely provide his daily necessity. Let alone hiring a hitman.

That left him with not many options. So he tried them all, hoping for death. Too bad that he always failed. Or rather, still alive.

One more thing that Jisung finds strange is that he is _always_ so lucky. Though he wasn't sure whether it counted as luck or not. But every time he tried to kill himself, there's always something or someone that prevented him from doing so.

He finally saw the pattern after the attempt this time. 

A patrol boat when he threw himself to the Han River? The loan sharks suddenly took away his car the night he planned to kill himself by smoke in that car? The water incident this morning?

Isn't it weird?

But Jisung didn't pay much mind to it. Maybe those times weren't just his time. Maybe tomorrow. Yeah, tomorrow. Or maybe tonight.

There's one method left in his brain. It was all his brain could think of, mainly because he hadn't eaten anything in like, a day? His brain was short on glucose, and it was the best of his brain for now. Well, if it works, for eternity.

He went to the storage room, pushing his body past the stacked boxes of his thing. He opened one of the drawers he used to place in his bedroom. It was dusty, but the rope inside was ready.

And Jisung is tall, tall enough to set the rope on the fan on the ceiling. The rope felt heavy and rough in his hand. But he was ready. Very ready he felt his vein pumping adrenaline all over his body. His heart thumping loud under his palm.

He sighed and took a deep breath.

He put a stool under the fan and climbed up. He held the rope tight, this will be his final necklace. Though he never had a thing for necklace. But maybe this one’s okay.

He put it around his neck. Once he kicks the stool, the rope will be the only thing that keeps him in the air. His legs would flail around and his hands would struggle to take off the rope. But isn't that what he wanted?

So he did that.

Soon, Jisung was knocked out of breath. The rope tightening around his neck, constricting his will to breathe and being alive. When the air supply got thin, his vision blurred. He didn't know if it was because of the tears or lack of oxygen. In the middle of a blurry vision, he heard someone slammed open the door.

"Park, I already told you to pay- Oh my God!" he heard a woman shrieked. And then everything became a blur.

🐹

Park Jisung woke up at 8 am the next morning. His eyelids were heavy. He tried to separate his eyelids but closed it once he saw a blinding light. Behind the closed eyelids, he could make up his surroundings. It was white, and blinding in his eyes. Too bright.

Jisung woke up in an all white room. He knew this place, he already got sent to this place many times before. There's always good people who tried to save him. Jisung didn't know if he should be thankful for them or not. Maybe he should. Or not. Maybe not. Or-

"Park Jisung?" He heard a voice. It belongs to an old man. The tone and the graveness in his voice told him. He glanced to the side, eyelids opening a little, trying to adjust. There was a man in a doctor attire. A doctor he supposed. Because hell, what else he could be.

"Park Jisung? How are you feeling?"

The question wasn't offending or anything, but he felt annoyed as hell. Jisung groaned. 

This feeling was similar to the one he felt years ago. The feeling of being woken up by the sisters in the orphanage. Wakes up at 4 am to attend daily prayer in a small capel. Even if the bed in the orphanage was too small for his spindly limbs, it still felt better than sitting on your knees on a hard wooden floor of the capel. Little childrens cramped up in the small space, all seeking Heaven. Jisung was forced. But he couldn't help but wonder if Heaven does exist or not. If God exists or not.

What if there's nothing after you die? What if it was just a constant black. Nothingness?

It was forced, but he prayed nonetheless. Scared of the consequences.

Jisung prayed for many things. Wealthiness, prosperity, money, assets, and many more. At one point, he realized that it’s the same thing. But Jisung didn't care because that's what he needs the most. You're nothing without money in this world. And Jisung learnt it ever since he first stepped foot in the orphanage. 

His life wouldn't be so hard if you had money.

"Park Jisung? Do you hear me?"

Jisung tried to sit but his neck felt sore. He groaned again and went back to laying down. "Yes,” he breathed out, but it came out as a hiss.

"How do you feel?"

"My neck is hurt," Jisung stated. His hand reaching up to his neck. He expected a scar or something but it was just a bruise. Circling his neck.

The doctor hummed but made no notes whatsoever. As if it was expected from him. "Any other discomfort?"

"No. I just need some sleep in my house. Can I go?"

The doctor put on a strained smile. "I'm afraid not Mr. Park. You still need some rest _here_. And some check-ups later on. But for now you can just sleep," the doctor explained. And with that, he left, the nurse tailing behind him. Jisung slammed his head down on the pillow and groaned behind the closed door.

Great, now he had to pay the water bills, electricity bills, _and_ the hospital bills.

He stared at the unchanging white ceiling of the room and then to his surrounding. He wasn't alone in the hospital room. Such comfort and luxury can only be tasted by those with extra money. Jisung could only wish. He looked around the room and felt thankful that there weren't any children patient around. That would be a pain in the ass.

There were six beds including his. Each being separated by a curtain. For that he was thankful too. 

On the bright side, it took him back to when he attended the annual retreat when he was still fifteen. Actually, it wasn’t so bright, the more he thought about it. 

He was on the bed near the door, near the access. At this distance, he could just go home after paying the bills, but actually the doctor was right. His bruises needed some treatment. Maybe one more night, he suggested to himself.

The curtain of the bed next to him was open and besides him was an empty and neat bed. Besides the empty bed, all of the beds were occupied. But he could only see the one in front of him, facing him.

There, on the bed was a boy, his age or maybe younger. He was so busy playing games in his mobile that he hadn't noticed Jisung staring at him. Jisung was mesmerized by how fast his thumbs danced on the screen, eyes focused on the game. Must've been nice. To not be worried about anything except the fact that you win or not. Jisung never got the chance to. 

Jisung broke out of his reverie when he heard the door slid. The door of their room was opened, showing a woman and a man. Husband and wife he supposed. They went to the boy's bed, each on each side.

The man - his father - put a plastic bag on the bed. He pulled out boxes of take out from a chinese restaurant Jisung knows. Instantly, the smell of spice and sesame oil filled the room. Jisung felt his stomach growl in hunger. 

His mother held her son’s hand, restricting his movement. "Pause the game, you need to eat."

The boy whined. "This is an online game! I can't pause it. Wait a minute, if I die, I'll eat, I'll eat."

They stayed like that until the boy got defeated. His mother kept patting his head while his father was on his phones in the corner. Jisung thought maybe it was the gene.

When the boy finally puts his phone on the bed, they eat. Eat as in having a full course dinner. Is that even allowed? Shouldn't a patient eat the bland food from the hospital cafeteria?

Jisung knew this was jealousy he possessed against the boy. Was it the tasty foods? Or was it the figures surrounding him?

It made him even more sick. He fixed his pillow and laid on his back. But the ceiling was boring, so he turned to the empty bed beside him. Not better actually. He closed his eyes to block the view.

🐹

It was dark when Jisung opened his eyes again. He didn't remember closing them but it seemed that he had already slept for a long time, judging from the dark room. The only lighting he could see was from the boy on the bed in front of him. His phone lit up his face and Jisung would shit himself if he hadn't remembered the boy. He thought it was a ghost.

Jisung realized that he woke up not because of the boy. Rather, it was because of a sound. It was a cry. The cry sounded so pitiful and it broke Jisung's heart even though he didn't know the person behind it. Strangely, the cry sounded so near yet so far, ringing in his ear. At first he felt the sadness, the next minute, he felt the creep. Who could be crying in the middle of the night?

After a solid minute of holding his breath and straining his ears, he concluded that the sound came from the bed beside him. Jisung knew he lacked the strength in memorizing something, but he swore the bed was empty when he fell asleep. A shiver ran down his spine.

Jisung couldn't see who was on the bed because of the closed curtain, but he could make out the shadow they casted. The person sat on the bedside, facing Jisung.

Jisung didn't know why he suddenly became so curious, but the next moment, he already found himself opening the curtain. Slowly, it revealed the crying figure.

The sound of the curtain being opened startled the man. The man raised his head from where it rested between his palms. "Oh? Did I wake you up? I'm sorry-"

Jisung waved his hands. "No, no! Don't worry. I'm sorry I interrupted you. Go ahead, I'm going to sleep again," he said, awkward as ever, already covering his leg with the blanket again. He closed the curtain just to be polite. He was ready to sleep again when he heard another voice. This time it wasn’t a cry.

"Who are you talking to?" 

It was the boy in front of him. Jisung sat up again, staring at the bright face of the boy. He looked skeptical, and weird with all that green light his phone emitted.

"Oh, I'm just talking to the person beside me. He was crying and I-"

"It's empty."

"What?" Jisung leaned forward, afraid that he heard it wrong.

"It's empty. The bed is empty. Who are you talking to?"

Jisung shakingly pointed his index finger to the closed curtain. "The man who is crying. Don't you hear it too?"

The boy laughed but quickly lowered the volume, not wanting to wake the other patients. "I don't know about you but that bed is very much empty. There is no one crying in this room."

Jisung stared at the boy. At his angle, the boy could see the bed beside him clearly even with the curtain closed. The boy couldn't be wrong but so did himself. Was he hallucinating? But the doctor hasn't given him any sedative yet and he surely doesn't need it. 

He felt a shiver crept up his skin.

He didn't dare to open the curtain again. He laid on his bed, facing the door, not the closed curtain. Jisung could still hear the tapping sound of the boy's thumbs against the phone screen. But other than that, he heard nothing. _There was no cry._

🐹

Jisung woke up with another level of soreness. But he figured that staying in his room would only lessen his life span. So he willed his legs to take him away from his room. It was still 4 am.

He peeked to another bed. The boy was asleep with a phone still in his hand. He hoped it would explode near his head.

He tiptoed to the door, sliding it just enough to make a gap for his body to slip out. Everyone needs some rest and he would be damned if he disturbed any of their sleep.

Once he got out of the room, he scanned the corridor. This ward has three chairs outside each room. They were for the patient's relatives. Outside his room, all three were occupied. 

Wow, this patient must've had a big family. And a dedicated one foremost? Jisung could only imagine someone waited for him in the hospital at 4 am. They looked weary, anxious. They're family must've been very sick.

Jisung closed the door slowly. He turned to the left and right end of the corridor. Now all he needed was to find where the bathroom is located.

"Jisung?"

Upon hearing his name, he turned to one of the men. It was the one who sat the closest to the door. The man suddenly stood up, too close in proximity that it made Jisung stumbled backward trying to back away.

"Uh, who are you?" he asked. He tried to remember the face of the man. Maybe he is someone he knows or something similar. But he remembers nothing.

"Jisung! I'm-" his words were suddenly being cut by the other man by covering his mouth. The sound coming afterwards sounded muffled.

"I'm sorry. He must've read your name in the name tag on the door. He does this sometimes, just forget it. Go ahead, we're sorry," the man said, smiling while his hand was still tight on the other's mouth. Jisung stared at the struggling man in his hold. Jisung was confused. So he tipped his head and went straight to the left, praying that that's where he could find the bathroom.

In the distance, he could hear their conversation.  
"You idiot, that's not how you approach him!"  
"Well what am I supposed to do? Don't just judge me, Hyuck!"

Well, now that Jisung knew one of their names, he could just report those suspicious men to the security if they did something fishy.

After Jisung finally did the deed, he washed his hands thoroughly. Afraid that the germs would cost him another hospital bill if being left on his hands.

The water was cold. But it wasn't the cause of the goosebump. There was someone beside him in the bathroom. Jisung should've known that he was in a public bathroom and it's perfectly normal for other people to be in the bathroom too. But this was different.

Jisung stopped rubbing his hands. The water was still running and he kept his head low. He was afraid that once he raised his head to look at the mirror he would see a ghost. This is a hospital after all. Ghosts encounter shouldn't be that uncommon.

But Jisung was a curious child, so he flicked his eyes. And he saw a man, short and pale. _It was a ghost._

Jisung bolted out of the bathroom, almost slipping on the wet floor a few times. He forgot to close the tap. But he didn't care, he needed to get back to his room as soon as possible and maybe he'll be safe under the thick blanket.

On his way to the room, in the middle of the corridor, his fear-clouded mind finally began to clear. The more he thought about it, man wasn't even that scary and Jisung felt ashamed to think that he was a ghost. Such a coward. What if the man is one of the patients and suddenly recognized him in the corridor as a weird guy who ran away after seeing him. That would be fucking embarrassing.

When he reached the door to his room, he noticed that the three men on the seats were gone. _Well, that was weird._ But he paid no mind to it, choosing to put his hand on the door knob, ready to open it. But he stilled again.

On his periphery, he saw something moving. Based on his experience, it was completely normal to see a moving object in a public place. But not really at 4 am. He really tried not to be curious, but his head unconsciously turned to the right, the cafeteria direction.

He saw a man standing on a table. A whole ass grown man. On. A. Table. 

He frowned. "Am I in a mental hospital or am I hallucinating?" he asked no one in particular.

The man didn't move for about ten seconds before hopping to another table. And it continued with other tables too. Giggling as he succeeded in landing on the other table. He scanned the whole cafeteria as far as his eyes could reach and found a janitor still cleaning the cafeteria floor. Why didn't the janitor stop the man? Wasn't he ruining the table?

He shrugged and grabbed the door knob. Jisung paid no mind to the man, he needed to sleep. He really needed it, his tired mind surely was playing tricks on him. Even when he knew that the sun would rise soon.

As soon as he entered, he threw himself to his bed and covered his body with the blanket, top to toe. Just to be safe.

But in the end, Jisung didn't get any sleep. The pillow was too hard and the room temperature was fucking with him. It's the awkward temperature between using the blanket and dies of the heat or exposing yourself to the monster under the bed. Too many discomforts.

His mind too, was one of them.

He didn't stop them though. Not even when he had his morning check ups.

Jisung was brought into a room. It's not the usual medical check up room. This time, it was just a room with a desk and chairs for the doctor and the patient. Jisung sat on the chair as the man instructed. "Why am I here? You're different from the doctor that used to check on me."

"Good morning Mr. Park. I'm Seo Youngho, but you can just call me Johnny," the man said, smiling. Jisung felt a little awkward but tipped his head in a greeting. "Good morning."

Dr. Seo leaned forward, pretending to pay attention to him. "So, Jisung, I heard you tried to end your life. Was that true?" he started with a bad question.

Jisung nodded absentmindedly. He rubbed the yellowish bruise on his neck unconsciously. Jisung looked around the room and found no medical equipment. Now this was new. Usually the doctor and the nurses were all over him trying to check if there's anything wrong with his body.

"Are you a doctor?" he asked.

"I'm a psychiatrist."

Jisung leaned back and made a face. "I'm not crazy."

"Understandable. Do you have friends, Jisung? Did any of your relatives or friends visit you last night?"

"No, I'm an orphan. And friend - I don't have a friend," Jisung said, now feeling betrayed that none of his friends or classmates ever visited him. He lowered his head but quickly looked up again when he heard a voice. It certainly wasn't Dr. Seo's.

"Really? Because last night a nurse told me you talked to your 'friends' in front of your room, Jisung. Another patient also told me you've been hearing voices."

To his ears, Dr. Seo’s voice was just a background noise.

When Jisung didn't stop him, he continued. "You see, there's a chance that - Mr. Park?" He stopped when he saw that Jisung no longer paid attention to his words, much less staring at him. It was normal for this kind of patient, but he needed to do his job.

Jisung who had been looking around the room stopped and turned to Johnny. "Yes?"

"Are you al-"

Jisung put a finger in front of his face, effectively shutting him up. Jisung leaned forward, uncharacteristically too close to Dr. Seo's face. "Do you hear that?" he asked in a whisper.

"Hear what?" Dr. Seo asked, unconsciously whispering too, already prepared with his pen and notes. Jisung noticed and got irritated by the fact that this thing we'll be recorded as his abnormal behaviour. "Can you tell me more?"

Jisung flailed his hand near his ear, "Don't you hear that? Someone's crying!"

Jisung stilled. He stared past Dr. Seo's head to the wooden cupboard. At first Dr. Seo thought Jisung was just zoning out and staring at his face. But he wasn't, Dr. Seo realized when Jisung pointed his finger to the back of his head.

"It comes from inside the cupboard."

Dr. Seo looked at Jisung and the cupboard back and forth. He pointed to his behind with his thumb, "The cupboard?" To which he received a nod from the boy in front of him. Dr. Seo raised from his seat, reluctantly. He moved backward to the cupboard, still keeping a record to Jisung's reaction.

His hand reached for the handle and opened it in a motion.

Jisung gasped. It was true! There was a man crouching on it. The man was still crying with his head in his hand, hidden between his folded knees.

Jisung stood up but didn't make any move to get closer, still afraid. "Are you okay?"

Dr. Seo stared at the cupboard inside, and then to Jisung. "Is he here?"

"Yeah!"

Dr. Seo placed his hand in the air, "Here-"

"What are you touching?! Are you a pervert?" Jisung yelled. 

This kind of behaviour was unacceptable, even coming from a doctor. He quickly went to Dr. Seo's side, trying to protect the man. Jisung couldn't see his face, but he thought that the cry was familiar. Jisung kneeled in front of the cupboard, checking the man.

"Are you alright, Mister?"

Dr. Seo's hand quickly retracted, he didn't know how to react. He put his awkward hand on his hair, scratching a spot. His head wasn't even itchy, just to look busy. 

"Mister?" Jisung asked again.

Jisung waited until the man lifted his head. He was holding a worn out handkerchief in his hands. His face was a mess of tears, red and puffy. He blew his runny nose using the handkerchief once again before finally spoke, "I'm sorry. I'm just really sad right now. Did I bother you?"

"No, not at all- Wait! Aren't you the patient on the bed besides mine? What are you doing here?" Jisung said, finally recognizing the familiar face.

Instead of an answer, the man only cried harder, to the point of wailing out loud. Jisung was getting concerned. His hands flailing all around trying to calm him down without touching him. He turned to Dr. Seo who kept staring at him, not helping.

"What did you do to him?!" Jisung asked in panic. Dr. Seo shot his hands up, trying to prove his innocence and his uninvolvement in this thing. Jisung groaned. He helped the poor man get out of the cupboard and got confused by how the man could fit into the small space.

"Easy," Jisung said once the man got into his feet again. Jisung Jisung held his hand and helped him straighten his back. Jisung lowered his voice to whisper, "Doctor, can I go back to my room?"

Dr. Seo was startled and broke his stare to the _empty_ spot besides Jisung. "Oh? Oh, sure, yeah. I think you need some rest." 

The truth was, Dr. Seo, too, was afraid.

With that, Jisung went out and guided the man back to their room. Dr. Seo's office isn't far from their room. It only took them 2 minutes to get to their room. And it only took Jisung 1 minute to realize that the man beside him disappeared.

"What the hell?" he whispered to no one. 

He looked around the empty corridor. There was no one there beside patients far behind him. Other than that, Jisung saw nothing. He stumbled backward to the white wall, hands reaching to his forehead. He must've hit his head when the rope failed to support his weight and made him fall to the hard floor.

He dragged his legs to his bed, using the wall for support. He needed sleep. This was because of his lack of sleep surely.

When he got inside his room he scanned the whole room. The boy on the bed in front of him was already gone. Picked up by his parents to go somewhere nice maybe. And the bed besides him was still empty, neat and untouched.

He plopped down his bed and closed his eyes for a second. Or maybe he has forgotten his sense of time because he actually closed his eyes for too long - certainly more than a second. It's already midnight. Did he pass out?

He sat up and his head was spinning. You see, a solid twelve hours of sleep brings you nothing but headache. He massaged his temple to ease the pain. Maybe it's his low blood pressure too. God, why does he have so many complications. He asked for death and this is what he got.

The clock was on the wall above the door. If Jisung wants to see it, he only needs to turn his head a bit and look up. It was that simple. Except that he can't see the clock because there's a floating body in his room.

Bodies, he corrected.

"Huh? What?" Jisung rubbed his eyes harder and looked up again. Still the same view. He rubbed his eyes even harder. Still the same view except with galaxies and shits, also his eyes hurt now.

He backed away too quickly and stumbled upon the blanket that covered his legs. He fell on the floor. His butt hurt but the thick blanket minimized it. But still he didn't have time to worry about his butt. Not when there were one, two, three- _five_ ghosts floating above his bed. He gasped, though it was a late reaction. The gasp should come in the first three second.

The thing about the ghosts was that Jisung recognized them. He had seen them before, but not like this. This was straight out of his nightmare.

The ghosts that float above him looked even more terrifying in this lower angle. The ghosts looked down on him. In the dark of the room, Jisung couldn't make out a single coherent thought. His body shaking in fear.

And then, black.

The rumour of ghosts in the hospital he was in is not a new talk. The hospital really is a place for ghosts. Well, every hospital is. But other hospitals don't come close to look like a haunted house. This is the oldest hospital in his place and with time, this place isn't as great as it used to be. The exterior told a lot. And interior too.

The peeled up paint, the no-longer-white walls, the beds, and the equipment too.

He heard the real rumour the next day. He was seated on one of the benches in the hospital park. Trying to get fresh air rather than laying on the bed all day. He was practically fine and all, but the doctor insisted on having him take a few tests to ensure his safeties. Jisung was sure it was only because they wanted to up the bill. This evening he'll go home.

Besides him on the bench were strangers, gossiping.

"I heard that this hospital is haunted."

"Really? Well, I'm not even surprised at all, but are you sure. Have you seen them?"

"I saw shadows everywhere. This hospital had a bad energy. I can feel them," the stranger said. The other laughed.

“What are you, a shaman?" the stranger laughed.

"Stop laughing! It's not funny. I am afraid of my brother's safety. He's in this hospital currently. Shit, I'm getting goosebump."

Jisung stayed still, only listening to the conversation went on and on from ghosts to healthcare and then to politics. He had his phone open in his hand, but his thumbs didn't know what to do. His eyes locked into the blank google search box, shaking, he didn't want to turn to his side because he already knew what was there.

So what should he do? Search : 'what to do when there are ghosts sitting beside me gossiping about ghosts itself'?

The bench was long enough for seven people, but here he was, sitting on its very edge. Even when the rest of the bench was empty. Well, not exactly 'empty'. Empty as in there are no people sitting besides him. Only ghosts from the night before.

He was just relaxing and playing games alone in the park, sitting on a bench that still got the warm sunshine yet not blinding. It was perfect. Until a stranger passed by and sat on the other edge of the bench, far away from him. Jisung didn't pay him any mind at first. But then another stranger came, forcing the first stranger to move closer to Jisung.

And so did the other three. So now, Jisung was seated next to five strangers (read : ghosts). The exact same ghosts who haunted him last night. Life sure is _fun_ (read : fucking with him).

His leg couldn't stop bouncing and he had to put his hand on the knee of his right leg to stop it from bouncing. He couldn't risk disturbing the 'man' beside him. 

The ghosts beside him kept talking, and Jisung kept fidgeting and sweating. It must've been the sun. Yeah, the sun.

He kept his head low, trying to keep a low profile. That was until he saw a pair of shoes. He lifted his head. There's another patient (confirmed because he wore the patient uniform from the hospital, just like Jisung) that passed by. She was on her phone and from her move, she looked like she wanted to sit on the bench too. What she didn't know was that the bench wasn't exactly empty.

"Stop!"

The woman looked up from her phone, startled. She removed one of her earphones, "Excuse me?"

Jisung's eyes widened. His mouth agape. How do you explain to someone that they're about to sit on a ghost lap?

"Uh, I- This bench is wet. My ass is wet!" he said out of the blue. 

Seeing the woman's reaction, he immediately regretted his words. Not only that, now all the ghosts eyes were on him. He side glanced at them, they were all smiling, as if they were happy Jisung finally acknowledged them. It was scary as fuck.

The woman was skeptical. "Really?" She tapped the spot where the 'crying man' (that's how Jisung going to call him) sat. Jisung gasped out loud. Oh my God, she touched his crotch.

Jisung raised his shaking hand, trying to stop the woman from tapping the crotch repeatedly. 

"Yes! It's extremely wet! I suggest you sit on the bench over there!" Jisung said, pointing to the bench far far away from him. The woman followed Jisung's finger and turned back to him. The look practically screamed 'okay, I'm just gonna leave because I don't want to be seated next to a weirdo'. Or maybe it was just Jisung's imagination.

Regardless of that, the woman left. Leaving him with the staring ghosts. Now that the woman left, Jisung didn't know how to handle this situation. Fuck. Now the ghosts knew that he could see them. So he reached his pocket to fish out his phone. Hands shaking as he put his dead phone to his ear.

"H-Hello? Mother? At the lobby? O-Okay, I'll be there in a minute," Jisung said to no one in particular. He stood up and awkwardly stretched his arms. "Looks like I'll get going. My mother is waiting for me," he announced out loud. He didn't know why he did that though.

He only knew that he needed to get out of this hospital as soon as possible. He speedwalked through the park, passing by the woman earlier who probably thought that Jisung is crazy. But he paid no mind to that.

He walked through the cramped corridor to his room to retrieve his belongings. There were none, actually. He changed into the clothes he wore the day he tried to kill himself - a set of pajamas. It was pretty embarrassing but you know what is more embarrassing? Getting killed by ghosts. _That would be a fucking shame_ , Jisung tried to reasoning. 

He wore no shoes when he was brought into the hospital so he 'borrowed' the hospital slippers and went out. Not even thinking of coming back to the hospital to return it, because hell, this hospital is haunted.

He took an elevator to the lobby and sighed in relief as he spotted a big crowd. A part of him felt sad when he got to the hospital lobby. When he looked around, all of the patients were with their relatives or friends. 

He watched a little child in particular. The boy was so small and short, not even coming to his waist. It actually made sense because it was impossible for the sick to grow normally. His mother was feeding him food while his father stayed by his side. As if reality is mocking him, soon his brother came up along with his grandparents. Such a lovely family. It should be the same for Jisung. But he didn't even have a parent nor relatives. 

He clenched his fist tighter. "Now you're jealous of a sick kid, Jisung? Just how low can you get?" he mumbled to himself. He pushed past people in the lobby and went home. House, he corrected. And maybe he saw Dr. Seo avoided him in the lobby but he didn’t say anything.

🐹

Jisung flipped the switch.

His dark living room was no longer dark. But nothing could ever enlighten his feelings.

Jisung sighed. He charged his phone on his coffee table. Now that he is still alive, he has to unpack his belongings from the boxes and white cloths. He opened his storage to retrieve the neatly stacked boxes and brought them to the living room to be unpacked.

He was thankful that he was holding a box with books in it, not some vase, glass, or plates. Otherwise he would have been making a mess when he dropped it on the ground at the view in front of him.

"No way," he quietly said to himself. His hand shot up to cover his mouth in disbelief. "Why do you follow me here?"

There, in front of him stood the five ghosts he already encountered numerous times in the hospital. They looked like normal people. A guest that stood in the middle of his living room. Except that they could walk past the wall because Jisung was sure as hell hadn't opened his door for anyone else but himself.

Jisung mentally slapped himself. He should've pretended not seeing them. Pretending that they were invisible as they should be. Now that they know that Jisung can see them clearly, they're going to kill him. Or worse, haunt him.

But the shit has been shitted and there's no way the shit will go back to his ass.

Jisung observed them one by one, pointing at them one by one while remembering them. It's the man who was standing on the hospital's cafeteria table. It's the man who greeted him in front of his room and besides him was the one who put him in a chokehold after that. Jisung gasped. There's the crying man too. And the next one was the one he saw in the hospital's bathroom. The scary one.

Other than staring at him, they did nothing. Eerily stood still. Jisung took a step backward. "Please don't hurt me," he whispered. He hoped they got the message though.

He saw them staring at each other, sending a silent signal Jisung didn't know. Oh my God, they're planning his murder. So this is how he's going to die, in the hands of vengeful spirits. He wanted to die but not this way actua-

A laughter. He heard a laugh. Jisung stared at him, confused. The laughter continued until the ghost dropped down and clawed the other ghost's pants. The other simply kicked him until he was rolling on the floor laughing. Jisung didn't get what was so funny about him. He checked himself in the living room mirror.

"Oh my God," the ghost wiped his nonexistent tear, "Hurt you? Why would us?"

"I don't know. Maybe you're a vengeful spirit or something evil. You look like one," Jisung said. He quickly gasped after realizing what he had just said. Great, he just offended a ghost. "Then why do you follow me?" he changed the topic.

"Ever heard about ghosts, son?" the other ghost asked sarcastically. "We basically died with regrets."

One of the ghosts raised his index finger and began to babble, "Regret could be in a form of unachieved wishes or unfinished business. Usually they who died in an unexpected death became ghosts because of this. Ghosts also came from people who couldn't acknowledge his own death. Or to shorten it, a ghost in denial. Like our friend Renjun here." The ghost gestured to the ghost from the bathroom.

"Shut the fuck up, Jeno. I'm not in denial. You're the one who's in denial that you're in love with- hmph!" Renjun's word got cut off by Jeno's hand. Renjun struggled against his hold but it looked like this ghost Jeno is strong. Jisung made a mental note to be careful around this ghost.

Jisung turned to the other ghost when it started to speak. "Yeah, actually we got unfinished business here in the world of the living. We need to finish it in order to go to heaven. A shame for Hyuck not to, but the rest of us are different from him."

"Come again Mark? I know you too well to know that you're not going to heaven either. So let's meet again in hell, okay?" he said with a not so sincere smile. Jisung wasn't sure if ghosts could shivered but he swore he saw Mark shivered in fear.

Okay, so this one's Jeno, and then Renjun (the one who is in denial), Hyuck (who's going to hell apparently), and Mark (who will go to hell too). Who was left was the crying man. He hasn't uttered a single word ever since he stepped in his house. Jisung stared at the crying man, waiting for any explanation or something. But the man just smiled. Jisung smiled back a little, just to be polite and tipped his head in a silent greeting.

He wondered if he’d ever regretted trying to be friendly with the ghosts. Maybe later.

Noticing Jisung staring, Hyuck spoke up from where he clinged Mark, "That's Jaemin. You must've met him."

"Jaemin?"

"Hi Jisung," the man said, still smiling. He looked better when he wasn't crying. 

Jisung _did_ taken back by his smile. But what made him more taken back was that they knew his name. "You know me?" he asked, pointing to himself.

"Yeah of course. We need to know our host's name," Renjun said nonchalantly. The other nodded.

"What the- What do you mean host? Are you going to stay in my house?"

"House, yes. Your body, yes," Renjun continued. He was now staring at Jisung, intensely. Soon the other followed his gaze to Jisung. He took a step back, thinking it would lower the possibility of them being able to hurt him.

He gulped. "Are you going to possess me?"

"Of course,” Hyuck said, as if it was a very normal occurrence. 

“Why?” he asked dumbly.

“Because we need to finish our businesses. And for that, we need your human body.”

Jisung smiled with a strained and squinted his eyes. “Can’t you guys just possess someone else? Anyone who is willing to?” Jisung asked again. He can’t believe he tried to bargain with a ghost. But he had to. “Cause I’m certainly not.”

“Any reason?” Mark asked him. Jisung believed that this ghost is the most polite ghost out of them.

Jisung shook his head. “No. Any reason for me to let you possess me? No either,” he said with a shrug. He acted like an ignorant bastard and it made him a little guilty. But again he talked with no manner, “I’m not going to risk my body for you. Any of you. I don’t even know you.”

Jisung remembered that one time he saw a shadow tailing him in the dark hallway of his orphanage. 

_It was dark yet he could see a shadow and it wasn’t his. His room and the bathroom were only 10 metres away. But it felt like a long journey when you had to protect yourself from the ghost. He ran and even though the sisters always told him to be careful around the bathroom, it was slippery. His hands trembled in fear when he reached for the doorknob. In the end, he bumped into one of the sisters._

_Sister Monica caught him in her loving arms. Too bad little Jisung was too afraid to feel the warmth of it. The sisters in his orphanage wore an all black dress and Jisung thought that he ran into the shadow itself. That was until she spoke with a soft tone, “Jisung? What are you doing here?”_

_Jisung looked up, sniffling, “I was heading to the bathroom, Sister.”_

_“Why are you running? It’s dangerous,” she reminded him._

_Jisung didn’t want the shadow that was still lurking behind the walls to know that Jisung could see it, so he told her in a whisper so low, “I saw a ghost.”_

_“Really?”_

_Jisung nodded._

_“This is a religious place, Jisung. No ghosts are brave enough to go to this place. They are afraid of Him,” she said softly, pointing to the cross on the wall. Jisung stared at the half naked man._

_“But I saw it,” Jisung whispered._

_“Alright, I’ll accompany you here. Now go! I’ll be here and shout if you need anything.” Jisung was very glad that time. He went to the bathroom after making sure Sister Monica was still there, protecting him._

_When Jisung got out of the bathroom, she was still there. “Next time you’re afraid of ghosts and I’m not there, you have to outbrave them. That way, they’ll be the one who is scared of you. Okay?”_

_Jisung nodded. That night, he didn’t have the heart to tell her that he forgot to wash his hand that she held tight._

Now, Jisung tried to apply Sister Monica’s word of wisdom. Outbrave the ghosts. And maybe they’ll leave. 

"But you're the only one who can see us!" Renjun reasoned.

“It’s your business. Don’t bring me with you,” he added.

Jisung turned his body so he faced the wall. He checked the clock and sighed. “If you got nothing else to do, I want you to leave this house. I’ve got to unpack my things and you’ll only be a bother to me,” he said. This was a line that would be said somewhere in a horror movie by an exorcist and Jisung was proud he could say it without trembling in fear. Well, he’s a grown up after all, not a child who needs to be accompanied by Sister Monica to the bathroom.

There was a minute of silence after that. And if Jisung thought he was safe after that, well, he was not.

Jisung slowly turned around, slowly. A part of him believed that the ghosts were gone and there was no need for him to be afraid of jumpscare or whatsoever. But just to be careful, he played it slow. Slowly, starting with twisting his ankle, and then his legs followed. Even before he fully turned around, his peripheral vision told him that the ghosts were still there. All five of them. Except this time, they were _fuming_.

Jisung took a step back with his wobbly legs. In front of him was still the ghosts. But they were different. Their eyes were all white, as if the iris were gone to the back of their head. Jisung can’t see their pupil but he knew they were staring holes at him. Their face remained blank, emotionless yet somehow it scared Jisung more than when they talked to him. They were several shades paler than they were. Pale skins were almost translucent, revealing dark veins on their face’s side, neck, and arms. They’re veins were dark blue, a reminder that it was no longer filled with flowing blood.

They’re dead after all. 

Jisung eyes flicked upward when the lamp flickered a few times before completely off. The sunlight seeping through from the closed curtain was the only lighting left in the room. Dark green curtain leaving a green light from where the sunlight shone. The green light fell on their right side and Jisung’s heartbeat quickened. The green hue left an unsettling feeling on his vision.

“You don’t know how it fucking feels, Park. To die before you even live your life. And yet here you are an ungrateful fucker who tried to kill himself numerous times,” Hyuck said. With every word, his tone raised and he floated higher. He is shorter than him but now Hyuck was towering above him, long hair flowing in every direction as if there was a wind. But Jisung knew the window of his living room was closed.

“You don’t get to say that, Jisung,” Jeno said, his voice was grave and scary, layered. It was as if there were more ghosts in his living room. By his tone, you couldn’t tell what he felt. But the clenched fist told Jisung that he was angered by his words before. 

“Killing yourself just because you’re lonely and failed in life?” Jisung strayed his eyes from Jeno’s clenched fist and hastily turned to Renjun. Renjun looked away and chuckled before turning back to Jisung, “How pathetic.”

“If you’re going to kill yourself later, why don’t you lent your body for a while, huh? So your life wouldn’t be such a waste. What do you think?” Mark asked, smirking while arching his brow. Turns out Mark wasn’t so nice. Well, maybe a little because he asked for his thoughts. But that wasn’t the case. He was trying to possess him, and so did his friends.

He felt a gust wind from behind. Panicked, he turned around to find the crying man - Jaemin. Rather than looked angry, he looked disappointed. He frowns, though he looked ten times scarier with this form. Jisung directly stared at the white and wide sclera the ghost possessed. He could see his own reflection on it. Pathetic. Coward.

Jisung swallowed a bile in his dry throat. He hadn’t drunk any water ever since he left the hospital and now he doesn’t trust his voice even a bit. 

He croaked out, “What if, what if I refuse?” He turned to where the four other ghosts still floated. He knew he wasn’t supposed to test their patience like this. 

“You wouldn’t. But if that’s the case,” Hyuck flew closer to Jisung, now too close in proximity to him. Jisung could practically make out every veins on his neck. Jisung looked up to meet his eyes. “If that’s the case, we could just haunt you forever. We have time for that.”

They have time for that… Of course, they’re dead after all. Death is a strange thing, Jisung concluded. It is the end yet it is immortal. Unending.

His mind was restless because of Hyuck’s word. Envisioning the threat was a threat itself. To be haunted for the rest of your life. Living a miserable life yet they won’t let you die before they deemed he hasn’t suffered enough.

With that, Hyuck floated backward to where he stood before, widening Jisung’s view to five of them. Mark, Renjun, Jeno, Hyuck, and Jaemin. 

His mind wavered and so did his legs. 

Jisung fell down on his knees. He hung his head low between his broad hunched shoulders, not noticing the slight worry in their eyes. He stared at the wooden floor of his living room. It wasn’t even a real wood plank. It was a sticker. He couldn’t afford a house with the real wood floor. Hell, he couldn’t even afford a proper meal without worrying about how he could survive the next week as well. He is _that_ poor.

He had to take a break from his college because he didn’t have enough money. He worked in a printing shop as the shopkeeper. It doesn’t really pay good money, but it was all he could apply for considering he only had his highschool diploma. This was the best life he could afford with his pocket money. And yet, it made him feel miserable. Life is cruel.

He had no family. Raised in an orphanage ever since he could remember. Were the sisters in there thought that he is a burden too? It wouldn’t surprise him if they thought about him like that.

Then, the fake wooden floor started to blur. He felt a snot flowing down his nose canal and he inhaled, not wanting to make a mess. But another liquid flowed from his eyes. His visions were cleared and he could see the drop on the floor. And then another drop, and another, and so on.  
Until he fully cried in front of them.

“I-” he wiped his tears- “I want to live too! But-it’s just-” He looked up to them. They stared at him weirdly from above.

“But not like this! I don’t want to live a miserable life,” he said, voice cracking midway through.

“Do you think I asked to be like this? I don’t like it. I wished to be happy and free. I never know how it feels, but death was tempting. At least I’ll be able to escape from my life.”

Jisung continued to wail like a baby. God, this was so embarrassing.

“I don’t like this,” he whispered.

It felt like another eternity before he heard a rustling sound and no longer saw green light on his living room. The floor was now light brown, his tears even more visible than before. He looked straight to the front and finally saw feets - the ghosts were no longer floating above him.

He hugged himself tighter, whispering, “I don’t like it.”

Then he felt it, a ruffle on his hair. Gentle hands and pat. It felt light like air, but it was definitely hands. Jisung was startled and he quickly backed away, falling on his butt. He pulled his legs closer to his body, away from Mark.

His eyes were shaking in fear, tears still evident in his eyes. "Don't," he warned them not to cross the boundary.

Mark was still the same - white sclera, pale and veiny skin. Except maybe his touch was soft on Jisung's head. 

Mark noticed that Jisung was still scared of them, so he turned to his friends, signaling something that made them nod in unison. Then, Jisung watched as Mark's skin returned to its colour, starting from his fingertips, crawling up, up, up to his neck and face. The veins were no longer visible, disappearing starting from his neck up to his face. Jisung can't help but stared at his face, and his eyes. His eyes have gone back to normal, human-like eyes. Staring at him back with endearment.

With Mark's transformation, so did the other behind his back. They were back to human-like Renjun, Jeno, Hyuck, and Jaemin. 

"Hey," Mark said, tone soft. "We're sorry."

Jisung still stared blankly at him, unsure how to act.

"We know that life is hard. But you know what's harder? Still existing even when your life ended. Aimlessly exist in this world. Trust me, I've been there before," Mark said. He looked apologetic, sincere. 

"Will you help us? After all of this, we'll go to the afterlife and you can live as you want- or die as you wish," Jeno proposed.

Jisung did the same with him - staring blankly. That was until he felt a touch on his back. But it was warm, and Jisung made no move to move away.

"Jisung-ah. It's alright. It's alright. Everything's going to be fine. It's alright," Jaemin whispered softly. At first Jisung stilled at the touch, but he grew accustomed to it. Ghosts shouldn't even have a pulse or blood. But Jaemin was strangely warm. His palm was. It did a thing to his eyes.

Jisung lowered his head to his hand. His shoulders shook with each sob he let out as Jaemin kept repeating the phrase 'It's alright' to him.

"I just want to live a normal and happy life," Jisung said between a sob. "I am scared. "

"Why? We're not going to hurt you," Jeno said. Jaemin shushed him quickly.

"Think of us as a person. A friend of yours. Or a stranger that really needs your help," Jaemin said.

Jisung lifted his head and looked at Jaemin. "A stranger?"

Jaemin smiled and nodded. "A stranger," he repeated.

Strangers were new to Jisung. Whether he likes to admit it or not, he is not the most friendly person out there. He was a type of person to avoid interaction with other people. Why, he didn't know. Maybe it was his preserved nature, but he didn't like it. His past relationship with strangers in the public was bad.

And he wasn't the type to help a stranger either. If he's in a movie, he won't be the one to help an elderly to cross the streets.

But these strangers were different. An odd case he encountered just yesterday.

And maybe he should change his action too. Different cases, different solutions.

Jisung gulped. His adam apple practically gave his nervousness away. "Will you leave after this? Will I get a normal life?"

"Yeah, I will and yes, you will. Don't worry."

Jisung paused for a while.

"I need to think about it for a while. Can I go now?"

They didn't answer. But they made a way for Jisung to get to his bedroom.

"Thank you." 

Jisung went to his bedroom. Climbed to his bed and pulled the blanket to cover his face. He didn't realize the figures that were watching him become more and more transparent as time passed by. Until they were invisible by naked eyes.

At first, he only planned on a short nap just to clear his mind. Certainly not a solid five hours of sleeping. But now he woke up to a dark room, sweating because he forgot to turn on the AC before. The worst thing was that he couldn't open his eyes. Or maybe he already did but couldn't tell the difference because the room was very dark. 

He stretched his arms and legs and scratched an itchy spot on his back. He needed to pee.

So he raised from the bed's warmth. Feet almost retract at the coldness of the floor. But his bladder already screamed for help at this point, so he willed his leg to take him to the bathroom.

The bathroom was located near the front door, practically in the living room. A weird arrangement he thought because wouldn't it be weird for guests if they came in and were suddenly greeted by a bathroom door? But then again, what could he expect from a house with cheap rent?

Low quality yet functional things? Yes. Ghosts in his living room? Hell no.

When he reached the living room, he was surprised to see that it was dark. He thought he already turned the lights on. But he figured that maybe he remembered it wrong. He always knew there was something lacking in his brain.

In the dark, his ears caught hushed whispers.

Alarmed, he blindly reached for the lightswitch. Once he found the familiar button, he practically slapped it so hard he thought it was going to be bruised. The lights were on, and Jisung screamed.

One thing led to another and now six of them were screaming. It stopped after like, five seconds before Mark laughed out loud.

"What the hell! You fucking scared me!" Jisung yelled.

"Why are you screaming?" Renjun asked him hysterically, annoyed.

"Why are _you_ screaming?"

"Because you did it first!" Renjun stood up from the couch. Jisung noticed how it didn’t leave a concave spot on the couch.

"And now I'm the one in fault? Why do you think I screamed?" Jisung defended himself. He clutched his chest, trying to tame his heart beat. If it wasn't because of his great self control, he would've been pissing himself.

Renjun huffed a breath and went back to sit beside Mark. "Mark, go talk to him. I'm tired," he said, messaging his forehead.

Mark was still giggling. "Oh my God. We're just discussing some things, Jisung."

Mark folded his hands together in a nervous manner and kept rubbing his palm. "So, have you made up your mind?"

Jisung already expected this question even before he fell asleep that evening. But still the question made him taken back. Especially because of Mark's straightforwardness. This fast?

"Uh," Jisung rubbed the back of his head. "So I figured that maybe I should just help you guys."

"I mean, it's the most benefitting choice I had. You get to go to heaven - or hell, for some of you,” he glanced to Hyuck, “And I get to live in peace without being haunted," he added. Not wanting to sound so easy to give in.

In a second, the room went back to its former silence. It made Jisung nervous and he didn't want to see their reaction. But he also wished that this ended quickly so he could just pee in the bathroom.

"Are you sure?" Jaemin asked, careful.

Jisung hadn't finished his nod when they cheered out loud.

"Yes! I knew he would agree with this! You owe me one Renjun," Hyuck singsang out loud to Renjun's ear.

Renjun sighed - out loud - intentionally. "As much as I don't like to lose the bet, I'm glad that you agreed on helping us, Jisung." He smiled to end his sentences and Jisung smiled back awkwardly.

They stared at him and smiled like there was tomorrow. It made Jisung over aware about his bladder.

"Can I go to the bathroom now? I really need to pee," Jisung said, voice right above a whisper. But they heard it well.

"Sure! Go ahead! Do everything you want, you're our host. Do what you're comfortable with!" Mark said.

Now that was just making this situation even more uncomfortable. Jisung tipped his head down and headed to the bathroom, locking the door after he went inside. Though he figured it would be useless because they could walk past walls if they want to.

Though they didn't seem to be the kind to do that. They seemed to be polite.

Now, the real deal was a banner written in read marker, all capital that was hung in the middle of his brain : 'STUPID JISUNG JUST MADE A DEAL WITH GHOSTS'.

Yeah, he does stupid things sometime. No big deal. Except that this one is. But no problem. He already shitted himself in front of the class when he was in elementary school, this couldn't be worse than that.

When Jisung got out of the bathroom, the living room was a chaos of floating and fighting ghosts. Jisung couldn't figure out who's who because they moved too fast and his eyes were still bleary from waking up. But they knew they were fighting.

God, what's wrong with these ghosts and mood swings?

_"I said, age order! From the oldest to the youngest!"_

_"You only said that to benefit yourself! Why would you want to end it so fast Renjun-ah. You're going to hell after all. Better stayed longer here before suffering!"_

_"I think the fuck not, Hyuck."_

_"Why can't we just sort out our business first. From the easiest to hardest?"_

_"That was irrational! What will be the measurement! Maybe we should go by height order!"_

_"Are you mocking me Jeno?”_

It was a mess of talking and swearing. At first Jisung stayed looking at them bickering, but soon his eyes and ears were too tired to follow them and it became an annoying noise.

"Guys?" Jisung tried to call them. Still no response. They were still bickering by themself. Only Jaemin seemed to be content sitting by himself in one of the stools, avoiding the mess. He giggled every now and then and clapped his hands like a seal. A happy one. It was mainly Hyuck and Renjun. Mark tried to separate them and Jeno was just enjoying adding the fuel to the burning flame.

"Guys?" Jisung asked again, louder this time. It half-worked. Now Jaemin was paying attention to him, waving his hands in the air. Jisung smiled a little, appreciating the attention.

"Guys!" Jisung shouted it this time. The mess stopped and they were staring at him. Now that their attention was fully on him, he didn't know what to do except fumbling on his words.

"Uh, why are you fighting by yourself?"

"Oh, don't worry, Jisung-ah. We're just trying to decide the order of which one of us should be helped first," Mark explained, hands holding Hyuck's hand to stop him from hitting Renjun. "No big deal."

"What do you think, Jisung? Shouldn't it be by the age order?" Renjun asked. 

"Why? Should we respect the elder?"

Jaemin hit Hyuck's head. "Of course we should."

"What about height order?"

"Jeno, I hate to break it to you but that idea sounds as stupid as you are."

"Wow, rude."

Jisung raised his hand a little bit, trying to speak out his opinion. It was weird because it felt like he was in a class where he had to raise his hand before speaking. "I don't think it's fair if you use that order. What about using games? I mean like, just to be fair. Rock paper scissors?"

Mark gasped. "That's genius. Why haven't I thought about that?" he asked, slapping his forehead.

"Okay guys, rock paper scissors. Let's go," he added.

Jisung figured that maybe Mark is the eldest. Judging by how the others treat him and by how he acts. The other followed his words and they started the rock paper scissors.

"Remember the game we used to play?"

"The slapping one?" Renjun asked, imitating the slapping on Jaemin's hand. Jaemin winced but didn’t move his hand away.

"Yeah! Everyone remember the rule? Okay? Okay we start!"

Jisung watched as they sat cross-legged in a small circle in the middle of his living room. Again, he asked a question in his head : ‘what's wrong with these ghosts and mood swings?’

"Rock paper scissors! Rock paper scissors! Rock paper scissors!" It echoed through the thin wall of his house. Jisung wondered if his neighbour could hear it too.

The game continued and Jisung was left standing alone near the bathroom, unsure what to do. A part of him wanted to go back to his bedroom and curled up on the bed. But another part of him was curious about the order. So he stayed.

"Ah, this won't do guys," Mark said, examining each different hand. "This way, it could take us a day just to decide the order."

"What about this, we only allowed two signs in a round. Rock paper for one round. Paper scissors for the next round and so on," Renjun suggested.

Jeno hummed in agreement. "Okay! Let's sta-"

"Wait a second. If it is that way, everyone would automatically choose paper to win. Nobody will choose a ro-"

Hyuck saw Jaemin already showed a rock. Hyuck sighed. "Jaemin, I can't believe you just out stupid yourself. Let's play again, yeah? This time without changing the rules. And Renjun, Jeno, I can't believe you used to be the top students in our school."

Jisung wondered how stupid they could get. But it was amusing so Jisung did nothing to intervene. So now, there were currently five ghosts playing rock paper scissors in his living room. Trying to determine who gets to possess him first.

Should he be concerned? Jisung think yes he fucking should. But he brought this to himself after all.

It took time, but they managed to get the order before midnight.

"Are you done?" Jisung asked after yawning. He just woke up yet he already felt sleepy again. Bored.

"Yeah!" Jeno said enthusiastically, nodding a few times.

Jisung stood up from where he was sitting on the floor near the bathroom. "So what's the order?" His tone was full of hesitation, careful to not anger the ghosts anymore.

They shared a giggle between each other and Jisung felt like his life was in danger. "We wouldn't tell you. You'll find out later," Jaemin answered teasingly. Tone playful in Jisung's ears.

"Okay, now that you finally agreed on helping us, and the order was already decided, what's left is to seal the deal!" Mark explained. He clasped his hands together.

"The deal?" Jisung leaned forward.

When he heard the word deal, his mind went back to one of a few horror movies he had watched in his twenty two years of living. It was about a man who desperately wanted to marry the woman he loves. So he made a deal with the devil to make the woman fall for him. It worked. But the cost was too much for him to handle and he ended up burning in hell. The character was _that_ desperate.

He wondered if he would ever end up like the man, burning in hell. 

"Like a contract. A business contract. Just to bind us to our agreement," Mark continued.

"What's the cost?" Jisung asked, just for confirmation. It's his afterlife they talked about. He wouldn't want to end up in hell when he dies later. If so, then what's the difference with his life right now?

"Uh, nothing? What should it be?" Mark asked, genuinely confused. But so did Jisung.

"Oh okay then," Jisung quickly closed the topic, afraid that Mark would change his mind if they dwelled on it for too long.

"Riiight. Alright, so first, we need to introduce ourselves! I think it’s important to know who you made a contract with," Mark said. He was like one of those lovely kindergarten teachers. Guiding the children when doing something. "So, let's start from me, yeah? And then we'll go on to the next person."

"Hy everyone, My name's Mark Lee. I died in an accident when I was 23. My hobby is singing and I aspire to be one!"

Wow, now the bar was too high. Jisung felt a wave of nostalgia hit him straight in the face. This really felt like the first day of school.

"Next!"

"Huang Renjun. 22. Died in an accident too. Won't tell because of private reasons. Hobby? Drawing I think. Yeah, okay that was awkward,” Renjun said. It was brief and did nothing to Jisung’s curiosity.

"Lee. Dong. Hyuck. Nice to meet you," Hyuck said, extending his hand for a handshake. Jisung accepted it reluctantly. "Mentally I'm still alive. I like soups and fried rice. Take note of it. 22 too." He giggled and repeated the 'too-too'.

"I haven't really thought about my unfinished business but I don't think it'll be too hard for you."

"Oh. Okay," Jisung responded.

"And I'm Jeno. Lee Jeno. I may not look like it, but I go to med school. I want to be a doctor when I grow up," Jeno introduced himself. He reminded Jisung of himself when he was in elementary school. His introduction mainly contained only his name and dream job.

Mark snorted. " _Grow up_. Well, sadly you're not going to, Jeno!"

"I know. Don't remind me again!" Jeno said, lunging to Mark to keep his mouth shut.Jisung learnt that Jeno is violent when he feels ashamed or excited. And he’s strong too. Perhaps Jisung should be careful when he’s around him. But then again, the eye mile he always displays kind of giving him a whiplash.

That was four. Now who was left was-

"Hi Jisung-ah. Name’s Na Jaemin. But you can just call Jaemin," Jaemin said and extending his arm too for a hand shake, ignoring Hyuck's _'that is because it's your fucking name'_.

"I'm a photographer. Same ages as Renjun, Donghyuck, and Jeno. I think my unfinished business revolved around my job. I hope this helps." He finished it with his signature smile.

"Wait, so we're the same age?" Jisung asked.

"Technically no because we died years ago, but mentally, yes," Jeno said, doing the math. He smiled and his eyes resembled a crescent moon. "Except for Donghyuck. He's mentally twelve."

Donghyuck scoffed.

“Wow,” Jisung covered his mouth, “Unbelievable.”

Jisung never really had a friend of his age. Sure, he knows some people from his university. But they are either seniors he knew from club activities or the campus’ staff. Besides, he took a break from the university. So it was almost automatic for him to completely miss the chance to make some friends.

But now, it feels like he finally had someone - an acquaintance - his age. Even if they were his age years ago. Also, they’re already dead.

Now that the room went back to its silence, Jisung can’t help but feel awkward around them. He rubbed the back of his head. "So, now what?" Jisung asked.

They shared a look, "It's up to you."

"Oh," Jisung said. But they heard something other than his little 'oh'. A loud grumble from his stomach. It was empty, except for the excessive gas it produced to replace the lack of food in there. 

"O-oh," Jisung shyly put a hand on his stomach, trying to hide the fact that it was basically empty.

He hadn't had any food since that morning and it was almost midnight. His stomach finally let out a call for help because it was threatening to digest itself if Jisung ignored it any longer.

Jisung's ears felt hot because of the blood rushing there. The ghosts must've heard it. They kept staring blankly at him.

"I think you need to eat something first, Jisung-ah," Mark suggested, chuckling.

"Yeah, you're right," Jisung weakly said under their intense staring. He felt small under their stare. Has anyone ever told them that staring is rude?

Jisung went to the kitchen, planning to make some midnight snacks. They were tailing behind him, following him to the kitchen. Jisung wondered if they were hungry too. Do they even feel hungry? How it feels like to be a ghost. Existing without a body. You just, exist. Just exist.

It brought pity to his heart. Just imagining himself wandering alone, watching living persons living their best life. You desire it, but you can't even feel it anymore. Was being ghost meant a constant numb feeling? Suddenly he felt his hunger dissipated.

But still, his hand was eager to open the fridge and see what's inside. He slammed it open and immediately frowned. There was nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Jisung forgot about it again. That he was really really prepared for the suicide. He even emptied his fridge.

He closed the fridge's door and stood up. When he turned around, he was met with five curious pairs of eyes. "What is it?" Jaemin asked.

"I ran out of food," Jisung said, frowning. His hunger was killing him. Out of all recommended methods of suicide, starving yourself isn't one of them and Jisung finally knows why. "I guess I'll just sleep again."

Jisung was ready to go back to his bedroom again when there were hands on his shoulder that stopped him from doing so. “It’s not healthy! You have to eat something!”

“But there are no-” Jaemin shook his head. “No. We’ll go to the supermarket. Now.”

Jisung heard the whole sentence. But there was something that irked him to his bone. “We?”

Jaemin grinned and Jisung felt danger was near. “Yes, _we_.”

🦁🦊🐶🐻🐰🐹

**Author's Note:**

> kudos and comments are very much apreciated :D
> 
> [twt](https://mobile.twitter.com/amemmare)  
> [cc](https://curiouscat.qa/amemmare)


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